Just Not Feeling It

I have to make a confession. It's crazy-making Christmas time for The Salvation Army and I've been wearing a fake "Merry Christmas" face since it all started. Yes, I'm a fake. I'm just not feeling the Christmas spirit this year. Okay, so there's still some time for me to catch it - we're still a couple of weeks away. Ahhh...I don't know, it's pretty blah in here.

Sometimes this happens. Life is busy, schedules press, stresses of life pile up, major events take their toll...and getting all warm and fuzzy for Christmas just doesn't happen.

Have you had a Christmas like this before? You see the lights, people all start treating each other a little nicer, people in the mall get a little politer? (Is that a word?)  However, inside you feel just a blah, dull feeling, like you just can't get excited for Christmas.

That's what I like about Advent. It gets us ready for Christmas. Not in the daily Lindt chocolate kind of way - the real kind of way for a real kind of Christmas. So this year I'm embracing the gloomies and letting them take me to where the Spirit wants to lead me. I'm tired of trying to put on a happy face when I'm faced with all the stuff happening in this world. In my own world it's homeless folk, mentally ill and addicted. It's low income families whose kids are going to struggle in their lives and hopefully be able to break free from generational welfare. It's the war against terrorism, crazy gun-loving people south of us, partisan politics and elections and Christians talking about killing Muslims and taking a course a course in a Christian university on how to do it... I just really need Jesus. I need Him to come - here - now. I'm tired of Christmas being all about fuzzy warm, gift giving, money guzzling, food gorging -  chocolate, turkey and all kinds of goodies - I need it to be about that God/Man baby born in a dirty, smelly place who came to turn our world upside down and show us how to live Kingdom values. I want to think about what He taught us and how He showed us how to live. I want more of His grace filled love to spread around the globe and turn the world on its head. I don't want any gifts. I don't want to give any gifts. I don't want it to be about money and stuff. I want it to be real - about real grace, real love - God's love.

Merry (maybe not)  Christmas...Kathie


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